On Vacation......

Well tomorrow starts my vacation! Yesssss! I will not be blogging for a week. Oh I know I will be so missed. Dry your tears, I will be back on Friday the 8th and tell you about all the exciting times I had! Hopefully I will have some exciting times to tell about! See ya!
Happy 4th of July!!!!

Countdown to vacation.....

Only 3 more days til I am on vacation! Whewwww Whoooo! Although I have no real plans for a good vacation, being home to lay around in the pool all day is good enough for me. I'm sure I'll take my son places also. I haven't yet decided if we will venture out the hot choatic mess that is Fair St. Louis . It has been above 100 degrees lately, and I'm not sure I want to go over if it's that hot! We will however watch the fireworks from the Illinois side of the river if we don't go downtown. Hopefully I find some nice, cool, indoor places to take him, other than the Science Center and the Magic House, since we have gone there several times....I guess I better get to looking for some cool new places.

Here goes, my attempt at the meme.....

Tagged by Whirly Gurly

But first the rules to this meme game:Remove the blog at #1 from the following list and bump every one up one place; add your blog's name in the #5 spot; link to each of the other blogs for the desired cross pollination effect.

1. both hands
2. Forward Motion
3.FireCracker Realized
4. A Day in the Life of a Whirlygurly
5. What the *&%$...

Next: select new friends to add to the pollen count. (No one is obligated to participate).

1. Erin Go Blog - www.erin00w.blogspot.com
2. Joe Cuttheshit - www.jcuttheshit.blogspot.com

Your turn:

1. No responsibilities
2. Running around barefoot
3. Swimming in the pond at my Gramma and Grampa's farm....with the cows, I know, YUCK!
4. Boating with my family being pulled behind the boat on the tube..
5. Summers at the public pool with friends

It's not the heat........

It's the humidity!! Ahhhh! I hear this a million times a day. That and "is it hot enough out there for ya".....This IS St. Louis people! It's the same hot ass sticky weather we have EVERY damn summer. You know it's coming. I admit I complain about it daily also, with my non-air condition having piece 'o shit car. I drive in the heat daily and by time I get to work the back of my shirt is soaked with sweat. I know yuck! And if I could move, well I say I would move in a heartbeat, but I'm not sure how long I would make it away from my family and friends, but I like to think I would move. Maybe if they all went along, yeah that would be good. Anyway, no real point to this post I just have been hearing all day about the heat from the clients who come in and decided to write about it.

Bitchy McBitchalot....

Yes, that is me here lately. All I can talk about is how much I HATE this job. And really it's the hours. I used to work 1pm - 9pm on Tuesday and Thursday, well the part time girl who works 4pm-9pm only on those days was ok with me coming in at 11am and getting off at 7pm instead of 9. My boss ok'd this also as long as if the part time girl wasn't there for some reason I would have to cover. Well this week she went home early Tuesday because she was tired and today my boss has her working at another office. So here I am stuck here until 9pm tonight and I come back in at 9am tomorrow. I really hate that. It's like by time I get home, I only have time to get ready for bed just to get up and go right back to work. It is driving me nuts. I'm to the point that everytime I have to work until 9 I am on the verge of sending my resignation letter. Then I think hey better find a new job before ya quit this one, you do have bills. Damn adult conscience. Back in the day I would quit a job at the drop of a hat! I swear I had probably about 20 different jobs fromt he time I was 16 - 19. Now I have all these "responsibilites" and crap! Oh how I miss the carefree days...........

BB

Uh, that stinks!

Literally, this is the second day this week that someone has burned popcorn somewhere in the building. The whole building including my office now reeks of burnt microwave popcorn. I hate that smell!!!! Good thing only 1 hour to go......

Come on in.....

Last night I had my car parked in the driveway, I had left the doors unlocked because I usually never lock them even though I know I should I never thought someone would want that hunk o' junk enough to steal it. Anyway, my dad was leaving for working aroudn 2 am and saw some guy in my car. He yelled at him and the guy jumped out and ran down the street. My mom was telling me about this when I got up this morning. I was like "holy crap"! He was just sitting in there going through the papers I had above the visor. My stuff from the glove box; some maxi pads, and other papers, were on the front seat but other than that I didn't see anything wrong. Then on my way to work I stopped at Taco Bell to grab something to eat and went to get change out of the door handle where I always throw my change and it was gone. There was probably a couple bucks worth of change in there but the guy who got in my car took my change! I couldn't believe it. I felt weird all day today in my car just thinking that someone had the balls to just walk up in our driveway, and get in MY car, and then go thru all MY stuff. What is up with people these days? So that was the start to my day, guess I will be locking my car doors from now on. Lesson learned.........

HAPPY FREAKIN' FRIDAY

I am SO SO SO glad it's Friday!!! I am in a good mood today and I saw a carnival in my town this morning! That is the great part of having a kid, you still get to do all the fun stuff and people don't think your crazy cuz your just "there for the kid" ya know. Ha, if they only knew. I love it, I never have to grow up! And my son loves it too so that makes me happy to see him smile. Everybody wins you see.

I have had my cousin's baby who is 1 year old for the past 2 days. My cousin went out of town and I'm keeping the baby until she gets back on Sunday. It's been fun but it has definately curbed my "baby fever". I love her and all but she wakes up at 6:30 AM every morning. That knocks a whole 45 mins. to and hour off my precious sleep time! I had forgotten how much it takes to care for a little baby. She walks and all but she has been super clingly and everytime I set her down she starts screaming and throwing herself around. I know it's just cause she isn't used to being away from her Mommy so long. Other than the fits, she is really funny. Her cute little baby babbling, and laughing. I love when babies laugh. You can't help but smile. So all and all I'm having a great time with her. The last time I had her for a few hours I sent her home with pink toenails. They were so cute, her Mommy wasn't as thrilled as I was however. I think I will paint them again tonight. Girls are so much fun and since I only have a boy I have to use her! :-)

Now I would like to leave you with an email I just recieved for my good friend Nina-pop......

I had a dream this morning that me and these two black girls and one of there little daughters were walking down a highway and I kept saying we're walking on the wrong side of the road and we kept crossing the road and the little girl wouldn't cross so I kept yelling at her and her name was Secretaria, then all the sudden were on a dirt road with trees and it was scary and this scary looking guy starting walking towards us and I was trying to get Secretaria to come by me and I ripped a big branch off of this tree and then the guy was closer and ..... the alarm went off and I woke up, it was a crazy
dream.

**Note the name of the little girl is the funny part since Nina is a SECRETARY**

I hope everyone has a good weekend, see ya Monday!

I want you to love me.......la la la

That song was just on the radio so that is how it became the title....oh and that it is me and Isaiah's song! Ya know like 4 years ago when we actually dated. The other 3 years I kindof just stalked him and whined about how I didn't mean to break up with him and go back to my loser baby daddy, it was temporary insanity, and please please please take me back. Yes, I was a desperate loser. I was totally in LOVE with that boy for some reason! But I'm over it now. Mostly anyway. I did just call him to try and get back very funny video he has of a New Year's Eve party Nina-Pop and I had at our apartment several years back. That tape is so funny. I tell ya there is nothing funnier than a bunch of drunks making fools of themselves AND gettting it on tape! Whew, good times. Well I am done writting depressing posts about not gettting the job and they haven't called me boo whoo whoo!!! I'm over it now.

So last night my good friend who is also an RN, brought home a doppler from work so we could listen to our other friend, G's baby she currently growing. So we had lots of fun listening and then we decided to try the other side to see if there was another one in there since we have been joking since she found out she was expecting that she is having twins. She freaked when we heard another heartbeat. She goes for her 1st ultrasound in a week and a half so we will find out if what we heard was her own heartbeat or if indeed there are TWO!!! Wouldn't that be so much fun! Yeah, for us maybe but not her! That is what she gets for never babysitting for me!!! Curses!!

In other news, well actually there is no other news.
TTFN-

No new job :-(

Well I called them back since I hadn't heard anything, and she said they were "very impressed with me" but unfortunatly they choose someone with experience in the department. She also said she would like to keep my application on file because she really was impressed, she sounded genuine, it's just you always here that line about keeping your application on file only to never hear from them again. I am a little let down, but I truly believe things happen for a reason and something better must be in store for me. Hopefully soon though. So the job search continues........

Tina, ya fat lard, come get some dinner.....

I'm late I know, but I just saw Napoleon Dynamite and I loved it. I love funny movies with absolutely no point! Now, C, G, and I have been shooting each other quotes from the movie all weekend. Good times. Still haven't heard anything about the job I interviewed for, starting to get depressed. I had my hopes up too much. But oh well. This weekend was pretty boring. We drove an hour to go to the lake and swim, we got there blew up the rafts, got in the water, and 20 mins later we were standing under a pavillion because it was storming! So we waited til the rain slowed down, loaded the car back up and headed home. What a trip! But such is our luck!

No news yet

Well I haven't heard from anyone yet regarding my interview Tuesday. I was hoping they would call before Friday but hopefully I will hear something tomorrow. I haven't had anything too exciting to write about lately. I took a day off yesterday. It was nice. We went swimming until the storms rolled in and chased us out of the pool. That's all for now.

Update

I went on my interview today. I think it went really well. I was relaxed, I didn't get all tongue tied and actually had good answers to the questions. They are supossed to call and let me know something by Friday. So we'll see.

Not MY baby......

My 6 year old little boy just graduated from Kindergarten this week.....I know aaaawwww! Anyway I was going through the workbooks he brought home and I turn to the back cover and there it was ............
"I love Maurinna", written in his cute kindergarten writting. My boy's in love. I can't believe it, I thought I had more time before the girls starting becoming interesting. Just 6 months ago, he didn't like girls and there were no girls allowed in his room!! Here we go.............

Ok, Erin you asked for it.......

Ok, I have been debating whether or not to post this but here goes.....a mini "life story". I met my son's father "T" when I was 16 years old. I was a rebel child at that time and even though everyone tried to warn me that he was "no good". But I was a hard headed "grown" 16 year old and knew what I was doing. So I stayed with him because I was in love. So he was in and out of jail throughout our relationship but still I always was there when he got out. When I was 17 I moved in with him at his mother's house. I was constantly fighting with my parents about being with him so I just left. Our relationship wasn't that bad at this point, he was doing some illegal things to make money but being the way I was back then it was cool. So at 19 I find out I'm pregnant. He was so excited and I was so sure things were going to be great. He was going to get a real job, we were going to get married, yada yada yada......well soon after I found out I was pregnant things got bad, he was on drugs, and then starting being physically abusive. At first it only happened a few times and he always apologized, and things were ok for a while. Then when I was 3 months pregnant he went back to jail. So here I was 19, pregnant and alone. I moved back in with my parents and got a job at WalMart. I worked all through my pregnancy and got most of the stuff I needed myself. My parents were wonderful and helped me so much. My mom even drove me to the prison T was in when my son was 4 weeks old so he could see him. When my son was 3 months old, T got out and again I went back. Things were going good at first, I really thought maybe this time he really changed, as I thought everytime. But again, things went bad and he started the same old stuff. I had a child now and had gotten a little smarter so I left him. For the next few years we talked occasionally and he saw his son once in a while and then was back in jail. By this time I had finished a secretarial program at a vocational school, and gotten a pretty good job. I had a car and my own apartment and things were going good. Then he started writing and calling and promising things had changed and he was ready to settle down and be a good father and the whole nine. So AGAIN when he got out he came to live with us. And actually things were good for a few months. He got a job, he was helping me pay bills, and we were getting along good. Then things changed again and he started everything all over again. I didn't wait for things to get worse this time, I told him to get out that it was over. He moved out, and kept making threats of killing me and I better not be with anyone else and all that crap. Well that same month he went back to jail. Notice a pattern here? This time when he got out I did NOT go back to him. We spoke when I dropped my son off at his mom's and picked him up but that was about all. We would meet at public places around town to exchange our son, because by this time I had moved and didn't want him knowing where I lived. This worked for a few months then he stopped picking our son up as often and we heard from him less and less. One day he called and asked me to meet him at the gas station to talk to him, and he said he had some money for me. I went up there and he lied about the money he just knew that would get me to come. He told me this was my last chance to get back with him or he was getting married! I just laughed and said do whatever we are not getting back together. So I assumed this was just another of his ploys but I found out thru a mutual friend that he did indeed get married to this girl he had known a few months. After they got married we didn't hear from him. I did hear thru the grapevine he was back on drugs, and doing bad things again so I knew it was best he wasn't around my son. Then the biggest shocker. A few months after the marriage someone comes to me and tells me that T is on the run and the police are looking for him for murder. At this time this was all hearsay and it was just what was heard. Anyway, my heart sank into my stomach and I was in kindof a daze for the next couple days. This was told to me on Friday. Monday I come home from work and my sister meets me at the door and tells me she needs to talk to me. She says that there was a story on the news that day that they had arrested T for murder. I was in awe. I was crying, for so many reasons. I was devastated at the thought of one day having to tell my son what his dad had done. I was so mad at him for doing it (although none of this has been proven, they have not been to trial) and not thinking about his son, and was grieving for the family of the victim, and I guess I was also grieving the loss of any hope I had that he would straighten up his life and be father to his son. I was also thinking, "Oh God, all the times he threatened me I never thought he would do it, now what if it had been me?" I had so many thoughts running thru my head and all I could do was cry. How could I have spent so many years of my life loving this person? And how could I still "love" him after all this? Although I wouldn't be with him, and I was no longer in love with him, I still loved him for being the father of my child and being my first true love and never wanted to see anything bad happen to him. Yet now I was faced with this. My son still doesn't know where his dad is or what is going on. He asked about him some, but he hasn't seen or talked to him in over a year so he asks less and less. I just say I don't know where he lives. He does ask to see his cousins, but up until yesterday I didn't know where they were. So this brings me to my problem. T's mother and family want to see my son, I want my son to have a relationship with his father's side of the family, but I need to tell my son his father is in jail first and I'm not sure how to do this. I think he is too young to know all the facts especially since it hasn't gone to trial yet. But they want to take him to see his father. I feel I need to talk to my son and let him know that his dad is in jail, and ask him if he would like to see him. I don't think that decision should be made for him, and that is why I want to talk to T's mom and sister first. To make sure we all understand that if my son wants to see his dad then fine, if not he doesn't have to and I don't want anyone taking him up there, if that is not what he wants to do. Well so now you all know my life story......hope this doesn't come back to bite me in the ass one day.......

LOCK THE DAMN DOOR PEOPLE!!!

Ok, this is the 2nd time I have opened the stall door on someone in the restroom. I automatically go to the last stall everytime I go in there, I don't know why, I just do. Well this door opens outward instead of the usual way that would be stopped by a person sitting on the pot who stupidly did not lock the door. Anyway this one opens the other way and I just walk on in and BAM! Someone sitting on the pot! Check the door, I do NOT wanna see that! This time I even knocked before I went all the way in and she didn't say anything. Argh! This is just not my day. I have already set the alarm off today and had to call the police before they came, b/c the last time I set the alarm off I didn't know it went straight to the cops and they showed up. They weren't happy to say the least. Ok, now if I can just make it through the rest of the day without further mishaps! Well see..................

Strange days......

Today has been a very strange day. First off the good news, I got a called from a hospital in St. Louis that I sent my resume to about a month and a half ago. They called to set up an interview for a secretarial position in the Radiology Dept.!!! I was very happy about that, since I am planning to go back to school for nursing, this would be a good opportunity. Then I was on my way to work and decided to stop and grab a burger, and ran into my son's Aunt on his father's side. I haven't seen any of his family in about 6 months. And I haven't talked to him father in over a year. Since he got himself locked up, but that a whole 'nother story. Anyway, she said they are now living in the same town as me, and would like to see my son. I have no problem with this. If they want to be a part of his life they are more than welcome, I won't fight them on that but we need to talk about some things first. Anyway, so I came in to work and there happened to be a new client here and I didn't look at the schedule the night before so I didn't realize I should have been here at 12:30 instead of 1pm. And since I usually come in at 11am and work until 7pm, but today the other secretary isn't going to be here so I will have to stay until 9pm so I came in at the normal time we open which is 1pm. Well I messed up and the therapist had a few words for me when I got here, I was pissed but now I'm not, hopefully I won't be here much longer anyway. And I know I have been slacking a bit lately, because I simply despise this place and it depresses me just to come here everyday. I really shouldn't be that way but it is really hard to have any sort of drive to do my best when I can't stand being here. I know I shouldn't be that way. But today I will spend my day putting together a list of my duties for the person who replaces me. Even if I don't get the job I am interviewing for Tuesday, I will keep looking and don't plan on being here much longer. So wish me luck on Tuesday!!

I'm Baaaccckkk

Well I'm back at work so you have probably figured out we didn't hit the $200 million powerball jackpot. Damn the luck. We had a good time camping. We swam, played horseshoes, made smores, all the good camping type stuff! I came back with a sunburn, because I did not use sunblock because I "wanted a tan". Well this is one red tan. At least it doesn't hurt anymore, but my face got burnt the worst and now is starting to peel. Great, that is going to look just wonderful. And make-up only makes it look worse so this should be fun.